Covid and Capitalism: Healthcare's Iceberg

The Sinking Ship of Modern Medicine

I reached a boiling point yesterday. After years of medical facilities and providers being not just unaccommodating but actually hostile to those of us defying their malpractice by outwardly living in reality, I unleashed years of frustrations. I needed simple tests reordered. They wanted me to come in, which would be a waste of my time and money, as well as a risk. My response went something like this:

Doctor’s Office: “We can get you in Friday at 3:45 PM.”

Me: “First, there’s nothing further to discuss with the doctor until the tests are run. I don’t want to pay $250 to explain why I need these tests when I can do that over the phone. I can’t afford it. Few can. Second, what are your current Covid precautions? When I was there in February, critically ill after a very close brush with death, there were none. Covid makes every problem I am already dealing with worse, from challenging to life-threatening. I should not have to risk my health to monitor it. I realize the majority of society has gone back not only to pre-pandemic standards, even pre-Semmelweis based on the fact that (doctor) didn’t bother to wash his hands between the biopsy he did across the hall and my exam last time I was in. But I live in reality, and I’m tired of pretending and placating medical professionals who damn well know better, so they can feel better about their brazen malpractice. I don’t have extra health to gable away. I want to keep what’s left of it, and it’s stupefying that I need to explain this to a medical provider. I feel horrible in waves. I think I’ve puzzled out why. I need simple blood testing to confirm. So can you please, for the love of actual health, just ask him to reorder these tests?”

Doctor’s Office: “I’ll run it by him. Do you know where to get the testing done?”

I think she was flustered. Obviously I know where to get the testing done, as I just did the same testing a few months ago. Honestly, I’m surprised she didn’t hang up. I’ve heard nothing since, and no testing has been ordered. I don’t anticipate that it will, so I am now looking into various kits available for purchase through Amazon and other medical testing retailers.

The past few years, since all precautions were dropped in favor of society feeling “normal” enough to get people back to overspending, have been exhausting. It’s become difficult to know the source of my fatigue from day to day. Is it Long Covid? Is it an autoimmune flare? Is it simply the weariness of trying to deal with a society that is increasingly aggressive, angry, hostile, and in cognitive decline from repeat Covid infections?

Healthcare, especially five years in, should be safer than ever. Instead, it’s one of the most dangerous encounters we can have. Until about a year ago, I believed that the catastrophic fallout from removing all precautions in healthcare would necessitate a return to reason. I put things off, too long in some cases, waiting for healthcare to collectively come to its senses. After it became glaringly clear that the CDC had become Campaign Damage Control and abandoned its mission as the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, I still had hope that short-staffed hospitals, overworked healthcare providers, lawsuits by patients and their families over hospital-acquired infections, and the imminent collapse of healthcare as we knew it would force common sense practices. That didn’t happen.

Accessing healthcare involves risks that continue to increase, and being heard means avoiding mention of the C-word virus. It means pretending that gaslighting, abuse, and wanton disregard for patient safety is fine and even normal. And it also means learning to outsmart the abusive gatekeepers we need to depend on for testing and treatment by doing things like suggesting that our Covid-induced conditions are from something else. This can be problematic if not very carefully researched beforehand, but may be the only way to avoid being dismissed entirely, given a psych referral instead of appropriate testing, and/or having your medical record weaponized. 

As much as I would like to have a safe and honest professional relationship with my providers, I no longer believe such a thing will exist in my lifetime. I think often of Ignaz Semmelweis. Hygiene never really changed in his lifetime, he died in an asylum after being labeled mentally ill, and it was 140 years (1840s to 1980s) between his handwashing discovery and CDC releasing handwashing guidance for healthcare. One hundred forty years.

I also frequently draw parallels to how accessing healthcare is very much like trying to survive in an abusive relationship. This is probably especially true when comparing current healthcare experiences to being abused as a child, because there is the obvious power imbalance. You need these people, but they’re endangering you, and you have to pretend they’re smarter than you while they do very stupid things like question why you would wear a respirator during an airborne pandemic that has already had a devastating impact on your health. And if your excuse fails to protect a fragile ego, it may result in them weaponizing your medical record or firing you from the practice. While the latter seems fine if a doctor is abusive, the problem is that many of them are now, and finding a new provider can be quite stressful and require more spoons than a sick person has. Much like leaving any abusive relationship, it may be necessary to leave due to an emergency situation, but it’s best if you can carefully and thoughtfully plan where you’re going when you leave.

Even practitioners with good intentions who tolerate patients who still wish to protect their health are often compromised. Without the adequate time and effort made to recover from the brain injury Covid causes, practitioners are as good as intoxicated. They are making bad calls which could mean grave harm to patients, missing important details, and even acting out in anger. I’ve watched great reviews turn into terrible ones while researching specialists, with one OBGYN’s patients saying she used to be kind, attentive, and patient and now yells at and demeans them, and rushes them out of her office. The reviews don’t look like they’re about the same person. This is not isolated, but a pattern since Covid. 

Serious health problems are undeniably on the rise, filling hospitals, emergency rooms, and doctors’ schedules beyond capacity. People are sicker, and while deaths from acute Covid infections are certainly down, the waves of sepsis, cardiovascular diseases and emergencies, cancer, and deaths from these and other long-term complications has become a predictable pattern in the wake of Covid surges. And yet, both society and a large majority of the medical industry like to uncouple these events or outright deny their association in spite of irrefutable evidence.

I used to believe the healthcare field was full of people who wanted to contribute to the health of society. I no longer believe that. The pervasive denial of a dangerous airborne pandemic for the sake of capitalism and temporary comfort has been shocking. A field I once held in such high regard and wanted to be a part of is now such a source of pain, abuse, financial stress, and fear that I never would have believed it could be this bad. Part of that was some level of privilege, but things have also steeply declined in recent years. While I once felt sure that necessity would drive change, I now believe collapse of the system will bring a return to natural medicine. We should all start learning everything we can about it, and focusing on protecting our health as best we can. Allopathic medicine has decided to cave and cater to Covid and capitalism, and this will be its demise.

I don’t want to sink with that ship.